6 Reasons Why Marriage Is So Hard
Marriage is hard!
So, a week into marriage, maybe a month, or several months you’ve discovered that marriage isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. What once was so easy has now become the hardest mountain to climb, marriage is so hard! But why? Why has the amazing love you once shared with your partner become such an impossible task these days?
Here are Six Reasons Why Marriage Is So Hard
Satan is out to destroy the union God has created between man and woman. Satan wants to see you fight and begin to hate each other and he will slowly break down your family. He will constantly try and tempt the two of you to turn on each other. How’s that for starters? A few weeks out of the marriage gates and someone is already scheming to ruin your relationship.
The two of you are sinful. Don’t sit there and say you’re not! We all fall short of the glory of God, and that means you too. Whether past sin or current sin, it finds a way to creep up and devour your marriage. There are always consequences for sin, and it will poison your spouse and your marriage as long as it persists.
When you first met, you couldn’t wait to charm your new lover. You gave him the best you. You saw flaws that you chose to overlook; your relationship stood the test of time because of the perseverance and grace you freely gave to each other. Now, you want him to perfect his love and treat you like a queen, and when he falls short, all heck breaks loose. It’s no longer all about him it has become all about you. The same goes for him. He once thought your mood swings were cute; your bed-head was gorgeous and now has higher expectations of his wife. Once we start choosing ourselves and not our spouse, our marriage takes a turn for the worse.
- Turning Away From God
Your marriage needs God. When couples pray together, they stay together. Reading the Bible collectively cleanses your marriage and provides a resource that the two of you use to keep your relationship pure. Ephesians 5:26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word. Turning away from God will take your eyes of his will for your relationship and allow you to lean upon your own understanding. What may seem right at the time may be an adverse judgment to your marriage.
- Unequally Yoked
When couples join in marriage, and one spouse is saved, and the other is not, or one spouse is much further along in their walk with Christ, this will surely cultivate a strained and tense relationship. It’s still possible after marriage to make a marriage work, but it makes for tricky times. 2 Corinthians 6:14 say’s, Do not team up with those who are unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? A man will not understand his call to be a Godly leader in the home, nor will a woman understand God’s will for her to be submissive and a respectful wife. When one partner is strong in Christ, they choose to walk away from their relationship with Christ and join their worldly relationship. Strife will be on the horizon.
God’s expectations for marriage are not the same as our personal expectations. We want the perfect husband, a godly leader; he’s kind, generous, a great father, an amazing provider, a great lover. But when something doesn’t meet our hopes and dreams we start to tear our spouse down because of his shortcomings. God did not design marriage to make you feel like Cinderella every day. He designed marriage to glorify himself, make you stronger in Christ and to pursue a kind of love that is patient, slow to anger, one that perseveres and stands firm through every storm. When our expectations start to get in the way, misery will set up roadblocks on your path of love.
Marriage is no walk in the park, but it can be an incredible journey. Every day is work. Not hard, laboring work, but a work that is purposeful in making your spouse feel cherished, valued and loved. Keep God at the very center of your marriage, next, your spouse then yourself. I by no means feel you should put your own well-being on the back burner, but I do mean making your spouse feel so treasured, esteemed, and appreciated before you choose yourself. Christ served his people and love was unfailing and perfect. He modeled how love should be bountiful in marriage.